Location : Ridgefield,CT
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Below is a portion of an email I sent to Brent, whom I met through our mutual friend, Virgil (his beloved cat).I have included his response as well- He was my friend and I miss him. I do believe the Angels were speaking to us that day:----- Original Message -----
From: nancyjj37@aol.com
To: hbrent@optonline.net
Sent: Monday, March 20, 2006 10:18 PM
Subject: Hey Mr.Turner.....
Do you remember the day that you saw me outside the "man deli" and you said"Hey Nancy" and i didn't recognize you at first? Well, I will tell you a secret.... in that moment that I saw you standing there, and in the time it took to process who you were, you looked like an Angel standing there before me. For a moment I thought I was dreaming.The sun lit you up from behind and shone on your face and glittttered in your hair and you were absolutely, surprisingly beautiful right then. I went back to work and even told people how I had just seen you and how amazing you appeared. It was truly almost spiritual. I always wanted to tell you that.
His Response:-----Original Message-----
From: Howard Brent Turner
To: nancyjj37@aol.com
that is one of the nicest ! emails I have ever rec'd - thank you ! ... I am speechless ! ...
The Angels were getting ready for their friend, and they are taking good care of him now, I'm sure. Nancy
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Location : Connecticut
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Brent is irreplaceable; any other words just don?t seem to capture him. He gave a gift to everyone that knew him. I hope you (his parents) take a great deal of pride in having raised such a dignified, loyal and sensitive gentleman. I know he is in better a place now and that he has found his peace. I am happy for the time I had with Brent. He showed me how to love fully and unconditionally and it was a magical feeling. That was
his gift to me and I hope he is dancing now?
Love and God bless,
Kristen
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Location : Kailua, HI
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Brent,
Today (6/23/07), during paddling practice, in 6-man outrigger canoes, our boat caught the best, longest wave of the day. Patty Bell and I want to dedicate that fantastic ride to you.
To ride a wave like that is too feel complete release from everything except that exhilarating power beneath you, carrying you. It's nature offering you its best thrill ride.
Wherever you are, I wish for you, a wave like this. Enjoy the ride. I hope it's a good one.
With Deep Aloha,
Celeste
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Location : Savannah, Ga
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Dear beloved nephew-friend Brent, I miss you too much. I want to tell you that I found Virgil (cat); I guess such a crazy thought reveals my still alive and present yearning to see you again; and to see your face show a look of relief and happiness. I know that it was time for you to leave; I imagine that the thought of another "program" of constant evaluation just finally seemed too invasive and difficult for your proud and sensitive soul.
I loved you and still love you so much. You used to call me "titi" with the teasing and endearing sincerity that was your personality, to me. I'll always and forever remember our long telephone conversations referring to our shared passion for similar music, movies, and life values. I'm thankful that you showed me your sincere love and dedication to History. Your intelligence was, of course, apparent to all who knew and loved you. When I hugged you too hard at Jannell and Jasons' wedding, we ended up having such a heart-felt talk. Your love for Jannell and your Mom and Dad shined out like a star that beautiful day. I thought I would finally be seeing you on a regular basis with Jenni and Jan with us now in Savannah. I still want to keep a list of "things to tell Brent when he calls"...........like I used to.
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Location : New Haven, Connecticut
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I have been waiting to write on the site until I felt I could say what I needed to say about Brent. It is hard to share my love for him without delving into the pain I feel now and sharing some of my own dark hours. I have so admired the way so many of his friends have been able to depict Brent's bright spirit in such a beautiful way. Here is goes. I met Brent when he first arrived at Silver Hill, where I was also a patient. A friendship developed into one of the more meaningful relationships I have ever had. In 2000 Brent fought his disease with a passion and his dedication to his sobriety, his enthusiastic return to life, his deep love for his family and his search for a career to move him forward were amazing. He was an inspiration in every sense... My inability to stay clean made it difficult for our relationship to continue on the course for which it was bound. However, I quickly found out what a true friend he was, as he brought me back to Silver Hill, time and again, never hesitated to call my mother, sponsor or psychiatrist if he felt I was in need of help. He was there for me in many of my darkest hours, to listen, to encourage and to let me know I was worthy of more than the self-destructive path I was continually revisiting. He never gave up on me and he continued to remind me of all the beauty and potential he saw in my soul. I left New Canaan in 2003 and while my life has still had its ups and downs- I am now at a place of which I know Brent would be proud. I have a son, who has changed my life and was born an hour and a half, to the minute, after Brent's nephew. I am getting married to a man who treats me with love and respect and with whom I love deeply on October 1st and I have been clean for the longest stretch yet. Most of all I am happy. Brent would know that for me to say that so plainly and to feel it so deeply in my heart is my greatest acheivment yet. It pains me not to have shared this all with Brent, face to face... Yet as I told Janelle I know this is my greatest gift to him and I know that just as he was my angel in life with his protective nature and the way he always appeared when I needed someone who believed in me... I know he is my angel now. That alone allows me to feel peace, the knowledge that Brent will be there looking out for me, just like he always did. Brent, I miss you so much and I wish I could have been there to give you even just an ounce of all the love and support you gave me when you needed it. I know God has a plan and all I can guess is that he saw what an amazing gift you had to love and protect those around you and he needed you by his side. I will be watching for you. Love- Laura
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Location : New York, NY
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It was so nice to see everyone at the gathering in New York and hear so many stories about Brent. 10 years ago, I met Brent when I was living in San Francisco and considering moving to New York. He really encouraged me to take the plunge and after I arrived showed me so many great places that I still frequent today -- Panna, Veselka, KGB, the Cowgirl... I hadn't talked to him in several years, but I still thought of him all the time when I went to some of the places he took me or when I said "hot as balls" which, funnily, has become a permanent part of my vocabulary. When I heard that he was gone, I had a big, long cry as I remembered all the things I loved about him. After several minutes I started to feel better. I blew my nose (sorry if this is too much information) and took a wild shot at the trash can across the room, and it sailed in perfectly. It sounds silly but I really felt that was his way of showing that he was feeling me at the moment. I mean, if the afterlife is anything like Ghost I can see him using his magical powers to help people land their shots, you know? I said "thanks" outloud and laughed and I really felt like he was laughing with me. Brent, I miss you so much and wish like anything you could have felt as good as you made other people feel, but I know you are in a better place. I'm so glad I knew you and I'll be seeing you in my dreams. Much peace and love, Kate
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Location : New York, NY
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H.B.T. was a dear friend of mine. He loved music and he loved us. I will always remember him giving me Cagnee & Lacee a CD I cherished. I have passed it on to his sister for her to enjoy. Whenever I create a new song I know he'll be listening. Whenever I can't think of the words I will sing to him. Whenever I am stuck I know he will be there. I am thankful that I got to see his light shine in this world.
I have uploaded a song for H.B.T. www.mysace.com/nyenyemenjiwekitchings
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Location : Ridgefield, CT
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Brent
I will never forget when we first met and how we sat and talked for hours that night. That started a wonderful 6 year friendship of many long talks. I never met anyone like you. You were one of my best friends and always will be. I miss you so much! I miss your laughter, your smile, our long talks about God, the world, the markets. I always adored how you spoke so highly about Janelle and your parents.
You were so funny Brent, I miss you terribly. I?m so glad we met! You will always be in my thoughts.
Love Sue
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Location : Greenwich, CT
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As I look through your photo gallary I'm reminded of your innocence and smilling face. You are missed and never forgotten. I wish I could have done more to be there through your troubled times. Take care my friend.
Atko
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Location : New York, NY
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HBT, my friend, you seem to constantly be in my thoughts these days after being out of sight for so long. You fought so hard and I wish I could tell you how proud I was and am of how hard you worked for life. 43 w. 16th was not an ideal by any stretch but living with you was such a very good time and you were a great friend to me.
I keep thinking of the movie ?Cool Hand Luke? and the scene where they show his smile a hundred different ways. That is how keep seeing you in my head, so many images of you laughing and smiling.
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